It is little known that Santa Claus has consistently sold his fame and prestige over the years as a spokesman for a variety of more adult products.
He has been the face of Pall-Mall cigarettes...
and Lucky Strike.
Apparently he is quite the fan of smoking, and any smoker reading this knows what goes great with a cigarette.
Coffee, loaded with caffeine and sugar.
Later in the day though, after the toy factory has been shut down, maybe it's time to kick back a few with the elves.
Of course a dash of whiskey in the old ginger ale really helps to take the edge off of making billions of toys each year.
Later, Santa apparently picks up things for the ladies on eBay. Santa, you the pimp.
The safe pimp.
In the late 80's Santa encouraged all us elves to play safe by creating a life size condom Santa. Now that's a traffic stopper in your suburban Christmas display!
Santa also has a small surprise for all you naughty boys and girls, and slacker elves running around crying about wanting to be a dentist.
Tase the little heathens.